Aug 22, 2015 | By: A Woman

Can you put your past behind? Day 518

Can you put your past behind and forgive those who hurt you?

Can you put your past behind and see the true potential of those who wounded you the most?

Can you forgive yourself? Can you forgive your past? Can you forgive others?

 

I found that the most difficult thing in my process was moving myself to a point of absolute forgiveness towards myself and/or others and especially in situations where I perceived others doing something to me with the experience of them stabbing me in my back. It is interesting to see how the thoughts were always in the nature of blame and anger towards the others and inside of me, self-responsibility was rarely to be taken.

 

I've been walking the process of self-forgiveness for quite some time and yet, there were times that I felt that I just could not forgive the other and I pushed them out of my life to protect myself from getting hurt again. Even though I could see and understand the mind pre-program design that took place, I felt that I couldn't absolutely forgive them and I justified to myself that the person will access the pre-program design again and will hurt me again. And oh boy, I really believed myself. Guess what? What happened when you fear something? You create it.

 

I found myself in a vicious cycle, unable to move myself to a point of resolution, forgiveness and creation and was stuck in anger, blame and fear; and what I fear the most manifested in my reality - the experience of betrayal and stabs in my back repeated itself which further enhanced my belief that the other cannot be trusted. Inside myself, I this concluded that removing them from my life is the best thing to do.

 

Interestingly enough, I was asking myself the most powerful question - If I cannot move myself to a point of absolute forgiveness, how can I expect others to create a world of respect, integrity and support of one another? If I am unable to move myself to absolute forgiveness, how can I expect others to change? If I am unable to let go of the past and start creating a supportive relationship with those whom I perceived to hurt me the most, how can I expect humanity to move towards creation by letting go of revenge, anger and blame?

 

When I looked at the above questions, another dimension opened up - If I cannot forgive another when their preprogram design played out - not only that I am sabotaging myself, I am also compromising the other as I am not standing in a point of support for them. I doom them to forever be stuck in their preprogram design because I took their program personally and haven't supported them to change; I doom myself to forever remain in anger, blame and fear and I lock down any possibility to create a change for myself and them. This was something I could not accept and allow to exist within myself. And so, I created a space inside of me for absolute forgiveness.

 

By moving myself to a point of absolute forgiveness, I discovered what it means to create and the potential that lies when we stop holding the past against ourselves and others. The power of absolute and genuine forgiveness is undeniable; It is only through absolute forgiveness that a change that is worthwhile, is possible. This is a gift beyond and gifts. This is a gift that only ourselves can give to ourselves.

 

Aug 10, 2015 | By: A Woman

Time heals all wounds. Does it really? - Day 517

Some say that time heals all wounds, but I found it to be untrue. When I faced a tough breakup break-up for example, it took me almost 7 years to "heal" while people kept on saying to me that time will make everything ok. And I believed them; I let time to take its course, but the wound was sore and didn't go away. In fact, it just became deeper and in looking back, it negatively influenced many decisions that I made.

 

It wasn't time that healed that wound - It was me, when I made the decision to actively stand up from within myself, take responsibility for my inner reality and with self determination, I walked out of the depression, sadness and fears that were just some of the dimensions that kept the wound active and sore.

 

2 years ago, someone very close to me had died. The experience of him being gone was painful, more than anything that I had faced before. I was grieving, and at many times I found myself crying like it was the end of the world, though I knew that if I would not stand up from within myself, I will find myself in endless agony and the more time I wait, the harder it will become to step out of the misery into practical living.

 

You see, time doesn't heal all wounds, only you can heal yourself by supporting yourself to step up and take responsibility for the experiences that you face inside. I know it can be tough. I know that these experiences are not easy to be walked through. I know what deep emotional turmoil feels like, but I am here today to tell you - you can make the decision to change your inner experiences instead of waiting for time to somehow take the experiences away from you.

 

This blog post is in the honor of this person who died, whom with his living example, supported me and many others in so many ways. If you need support to step out of your emotional turmoil, please visit DIP Lite for free self - support course.

Jul 29, 2015 | By: A Woman

Self-Empowerment as living Principle - Day 516

In my previous blog I ended off with:

"…This was an overview of what personal-movement within self-empowerment practically means though this blog post is a start of a series where we will explore the practical application of self-movement within self-empowerment. In the next blog post, I will continue with the difference between self-interest and principle when it comes to personal-movement within self-empowerment as from that starting point decision, living personal movement as an expression of ourselves lay. "

 

So let's start with firstly defining what 'living principle' means - a living principle is that which you direct yourself to live by as who you are within everything that you do. It is that through which you guide your life and your relationships irrespective of changes in circumstances you may face. Having clarity about your life principles can bring you insights into the potential consequences, may it be negative or positive, within any decision that you make to assist and support you with minimizing or prevent the consequences that are not best for you or for others for that matter. An example of a life principle is 'give as you would like to receive' because the nature of this principle is consideration of others and life as a whole.

 

As explained in the previous blogs, self-empowerment is the application of the realization that only I can empower myself within the decisions that I make and the directions that I give to myself in any given moment. it is one’s power to direct one’s reality, based on a decision that one is making in any given moment as a principle that one lives by. Within that, self-movement would be the action that follows the decisions that I make with absolute commitment to myself irrespective of the outcome as I trust that I will make the alignment needed to reach my goals/success.

 

Thus far, we have defined what is self-empowerment, self-movement and life principle. So what is the difference between personal movement in self-empowerment that is principles based vs. self-interest base.

 

Have a look - you can decide for instance to move yourself from being employees towards becoming entrepreneurs and within that, you would experience self-empowerment as the success of the business is a direct relationship to the time and effort that you put into the business. Now, when you reached a point of success and you are profitable and are living a very comfortable life you must ask yourself -

"Am I living by life principles or am I living in self-interest?"

 

For instance, if we take 'give as you would like to receive' as a life principle we may consider to use a percentage of our profit to give back to society or to donate to a nonprofit organizations that actively aiming to create a change in this world. Why? We must understanding that we were lucky to be in a position that allowed us to leave our jobs and start a business because we were born in the 'right side' of the equation while the majority of this world were born into the 'wrong side' of the equation with no access to money, education, health care, nutrition and so forth; and if we place ourselves in their shoes, wouldn't we want to receive support from those who are in a financial position that allows them to support us to get access to education, to money to healthcare and so forth? I am sure we all do.

 

Another way to look at personal movement within self-empowerment that is based on principle is to ask ourselves -  "Am I empowering myself AND others or am I walking on other people's toes to gain my individual self-empowered experience?" Here you may find that while you are on the path of personal self-empowerment, you would sabotage other people's life in reaching your personal goals and thus, may want to reassess your commitments and application to one that is life principle based.

 

Yes, I do understand that within this current world system, sometimes we will make tough decisions that may seem as if we acted upon self-interest baseline though, this is for each and every one to assess their self-honesty whether the decision that we made is one that is of support of life or whether the decision that we made is of self-interest.

 

Will be continued…

 

 

 

 

Jul 14, 2015 | By: A Woman

Personal Movement within Self-Empowerment - Day 515

What is personal Movement within self-empowerment? to answer this question, we first have to define the words "Personal-Movement". What is Personal-movement?

Personal movement is an expression of ourselves where in any given moment, we are the directive principle of our own reality, inside and out,  deciding to give ourselves direction in taking action. Action can be anything really, can be a decision to make breakfast, a decision to step out of the house and go to work, a decision to make a phone call, a decision to rest, and even a decision to stop the ranting and raving in the mind and take a breath.

 

As I discussed in one of my previous blogs: Self-Empowerment - Practical Living - The Decision (Part 3) - Day 511 - everything we do or do not do in our lives comes down to a decision that we make in real time moments. The outflows of these decisions may or may not be the desirable outcome though, though it is an outcome that is deriving from the decisions that we made.

 

When it comes to Self-Movement within Self-Empowerment, what we must realize is that we can either decide to continue waiting for random events to take place in our lives or we can decide that we are the directive principle of our lives and as such, it is up to us to empower ourselves within the movements/actions that we take while considering the possible outcomes within the principles that we have set forth for ourselves to live by.

 

Waiting or hoping that certain events will play out the way we would have liked it to plat out is an expression of deliberate disempowerment as we abdicate our responsibility to direct our lives and support the lives of others. Usually, when the playouts aren't the desirable ones, we would continually blame and resent those that were involved in the playout while not seeing that all this time we were sitting in our comfort zone without taking any action. Those who living self-movement within self-empowerment as an expression of themselves are actively moving themselves to a point of achieving the goals that they set for themselves as they have realized it is up to them to direct their environment no matter what the outcome may be.

 

Now, one thing we all must realize - our self-movement within self-empowerment is not define by the outcome meaning, whether the outcome is negative or positive, it doesn't change who we are in the sense of - if the outcome was not satisfactory, one can give up and go back to a point of self-disempowerment, blaming or resenting OR, one can learn from the outcome and align themselves and/or their application/action until the outcome is satisfactory. Yes, it may be a long path to walk with a lot of hurdles on the way though the one who have mastered 'self-movement' within self-empowerment will continue walking, no matter what - no hurdle will stand in their way to achieve the goals they set forth for themselves.

 

This was an overview of what personal-movement within self-empowerment practically means though this blog post is a start of a series where we will explore the practical application of self-movement within self-empowerment. In the next blog post, I will continue with the difference between self-interest and principle when it comes to personal-movement within self-empowerment as from that starting point decision, living personal movement as an expression of ourselves lay.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jun 26, 2015 | By: A Woman

The puzzle of motivation - Day 514

 

I Was watching the other day the TED talks video - The puzzle of motivation with Dan Pink talking about the difference between how social science see that businesses can work in its utmost potential and how business managers vision and application is done in today's business world.

 

In a nutshell, Dan Pink explained that the more incentives the employees get, the less productive they are based on social studies that were conducted in several places in the world. They have found that when big incentives are offered to employees, the creativity of the employees is narrowing down and only focused on achieving the goal they were supposed to do while there is no expansion of their vision, skills, and productivity.

 

Then I looked at my own experience in my corporations days and found the exact same thing that social science measurably proven. The less incentives I received, the more productive and creative I have become. The bigger the incentives were, the more tasks oriented I was without giving myself the gift of self-expansion and creativity within my work place.

 

When I started the corporative world, I was given minimal task (telephone marketing) with big incentives  which was supposed to motivate me to bring the results the company aimed for. That was my one and only focus, to do the task as best as I can so that I can make more sales and make more money but I was board at work and besides the money incentives, there was no expansion and growth in terms of career path. The monotonic work was not for me - I decided to quit due to lack of interest, creativity, empowerment in the job that I was doing - it didn't fit with my personality profile and I felt caged in a box without the ability to grow. Fortunately, a new manager came on board just a few days before I quit and he spotted the spark that was still left in me of wanting to do more with my life. I moved on to another company and this manager got in touch with me, trying to convince me to work for him in another department where I am able to express the skills that I have. For years I refused to work for him because of other things that I was more interested doing so we instead just developed friendship relationship that we nurtured over the years. About 6 years after, I decided I wanted to go back to the corporation world and spend 1 year to make a lot of money, close the debt that I had and moved on with my life. I called him, told him I am looking for 1 year job and the next day, I started working for him.

 

He gave me tools to work with, he stood as an excellent support structure, taught me almost everything that I know today about marketing and sales as he himself is a master in sales. There was one thing he didn't do - he didn't micro manage me but instead pushed me to develop my self-empowerment within what I do. He challenged my creativity, showed me by example how to look outside of the box, he did in-field training with me through which I could develop more marketing and sales skills. He invested so much time in me despite  knowing that I will be leaving at the end of the year. I haven't seen many people in the corporative world who invest so much in another's personal development as he did.

 

In terms of incentives - the monetary incentives where initially not high meaning. I thought it was because I will be leaving at the end of the year and there was no point for him to offer me bigger monetary incentives. What I didn't realize was that the ability to create, be creative and expand my skills was the incentive I needed to make more money than anyone else in that company during that year. The incentives that he gave me was work/life balance and being in charge of my own reality whereas I could come to work when I wanted to; I could work from home; I could take vacations when I saw fit; I worked normally 4 hours less than the accepted working hours and yet, I was more productive than any other employee that he had before.

 

At the end of the year, in my farewell party, I asked him "I know we are friends and everything but I was also your employee who always did what I wanted to do and not so much what you had planned for me to do. How did you managed to work with someone like me?". His answer surprised us both and with Dan Pink explanations it does now make sense. His answer to my question was - "if I had to micro manage you and take away from you your ability to be creative, you would be gone after a month. I knew that if I want you to stay here for the whole year, I must give you the freedom to do what you want and I had trust that you will surprise both you and I in the money that you will make for the company. Now have a look - you are leaving us with by far more than what your job title was about - you developed systems through which we all can make more money now and that was something you never got paid for - you just did it because you enjoyed creating these systems for us". I never thought about it before he mentioned it - I did create a lot of structures for this company and never expected to be paid for it - I simply enjoyed doing it and there were no incentives offered for me to do it.

 

My two cents: if you are an employer who runs a business, I suggest looking into the point of empowering your people - inspire them to be creative, lead by example, be there as their support structure, listen to their creative ideas and allow them to test it for themselves even if you don't see it worthwhile - they may surprise you cause if you down motivate them, their creativity will shut down. Even for myself, I remember one day I came up with a new creative idea that my boss told me that it won't work and I insisted on testing it. He then decided to not go against me but to instead support me in the process despite of his opinion that the strategy I wanted to implement will not work. Couple of weeks down the line, it did work for us after all and since then he never said to anyone that something won't work, he supported his people to follow their creativity and see for themselves if their creative ideas work or doesn't work for them. The more you limit your people and shut their creativity down, the more dissatisfied employees you will have and the less chances your company grows to its utmost potential. Incentives are not just monetary incentives - the biggest incentive that one can have it so be able to be empowered and grow within what they do. The more they feel empowered, the more productive they will be as a point of satisfaction and fulfillment that is manifesting within themselves which will drive them to be the best that they can be, not so much for you and your company but for themselves.

 

 

 

 

Jun 20, 2015 | By: A Woman

World at War - Day 513

Refugees and migrants on a fishing boat pictured before making contact with the Italian navy. (Photo: Italian Coastguard/Massimo Sestini)

Refugees and migrants on a fishing boat pictured before making contact with the Italian navy. (Photo: Italian Coastguard/Massimo Sestini)

 

http://www.commondreams.org/news/2015/06/18/one-every-122-humans-forcibly-displaced-war-and-persecution-un?utm_content=buffer94444&utm_medium=social&utm_source=facebook.com&utm_campaign=buffer

 

A recent report by the Office of the UN High Commissioner for Refugees (UNHCR) expose that out of every 122 people on the planet is a refugee, seeking asylum, or internally displaced. 1 out of 122 people in this planet. Imagine that.

 

Well you know what - stop imagining because it is real  -  this is the physical reality we live in.

While the majority of this world forced into a life of war, abuse and constant fear, us, the minority, we strive for personal success, for more money, better social status, better cars, housing and so forth. Seldom do we really consider other people; rarely we take a moment to critically thing about the current world situation and how each of us is individually responsible for the world we live in today.

 

You may ask yourself - "why am I responsible? I don't make the laws". Are you sure? Aren't we voting every couple of years for our president or prime minister? Are we actively walking any path to change the laws and the economic system? Do we really want to change the world or it is just a fantasy we keep on telling ourselves and others to make us feel and look good?

 

"Far too many of the world’s richest and most peaceful countries are ignoring their global responsibility to provide assistance and protection," said secretary general of the Norwegian Refugee Council Jan Egeland, in a press statement responding to the UN's findings. "They are hiding behind closed borders"

 

"For an age of unprecedented mass displacement," Guterres continued, "we need an unprecedented humanitarian response and a renewed global commitment to tolerance and protection for people fleeing conflict and persecution."

 

So another call for my fellow humans - changing the world system is not going to happen unless we all come together, stepping out of our convenient ignorance into practical action.

 

Please read my latest blog: Together we are not Alone - Day 512 so that we all take our power back to ourselves, stand together and take practical actions. Please investigate The Living Income Guaranteed Proposal and watch

Fundamental Human Rights by Equal Life Foundation.

 

Thank you.

 

Jun 15, 2015 | By: A Woman

Together we are not Alone–Day 512

 

 

The night before last was an immensely cold night and even though I had the heater on and a nice thick duvet, the cold got into my bones and my body was shaking from the inside, trying to get itself warm. When my body started shaking from the cold, I couldn't stop thinking about those people, just here down the road, who sleep with no heater on, no nice thick duvet or cement walls to isolate the rooms from the cold.

 

I started looking that night at how the hell can I personally support these people - obviously, I don't have the budget to buy all the people in this world an heater or a nice thick duvet or build decent housing; and even if I do have that money, how are they going to pay for the electricity for the purpose of turning the heater on for example? And I mean, having a heater is just one small thing - these people and so many more are facing a moment to moment survival in a world of abundance which to me is not acceptable way of living is it?

 

Honestly I felt sad - it is clear by now that on my individual capacity, I cannot make sure that all people in this world has decent and worthy housing, electricity, food, transport, education and so forth. It is clear that 10 people cannot make sure that all people in this world has a decent and dignified life as how we would all want for ourselves. It is clear that 100 people cannot help everyone on this world to have access to their basic human rights. It is clear that 1,000 people cannot make sure that this world will take a turn in implementing the necessary change that is required to maintain and sustain a life that is worthy of living. But, don't you think that 1,000,000 people that are coming together can be so powerful source in making sure what needs to be done is done? And how about 1,000,000,000 people standing together as a powerful unity?

 

What worth does it have if we all stand alone, wishing for a change or wishing that suffering will end one day if we don't practically do something about it - TOGETHER?

 

There are so many people in this world who would want to do something but in some way or another, most of us feel that we don't know what or how to practically do it. This is because we each try to invent the wheel while there is no real need to invent a new wheel as everything is already here and ready to be changed in the way that is best for all. All that is really needed is our understanding that together we are NOT alone in this vision and mission of creating a dignified life for all people and animals and when we pull our resources together, all our individual skills, our individual power, we will become one unified force that has the power to demand and implement a change in this world.

 

So this is a call for myself and others - to come together with our individual skills, forces and powers and to together implement encompassing solutions on all levels of life within the vision and mission of creating a life that is of worth for every creature on this planet.

 

Would like to take this floor to share the following:

The Equal Life Foundation – Bill of Rights

The Living Income Guaranteed Proposal

Fundamental Human Rights by Equal Life Foundation